hard learning.

God is kind and will never push you harder than you can handle.. I'm learning to rest in this. The Lord is speaking to my specifically about some things he wants me to trust him with. Some things, lets just say, are between He and I. My first instinct is to blurt it out to my close friends or a leader.. would someone just give me some insight here! But nope.. I need to lean not on my understanding.. I need to do less talking and more trusting, resting, waiting. Not in what others have to say, not in what I have to say. In what God says. This is very hard. I don't like it. But He's here and He's good.

This past week was THE GATHERING. Cool name huh? Kind of intimidating.. A gathering of what you might ask? 200 YWAM DTSers. It was awesome. I had the previledge of Taking care of our two speakers Dave Buehring and Winkie Pratney - Such a cool job. They are seasoned men who love God and I learned a lot from them. I also got to see my cousin Tessa! O my.. our meeting was wonderful and I'm so sad it's all over! I took so much from the week.

Some cool notes from this weeks lecture (The topic was The Character and Nature of God):

Remember who lives in you.

The Lord has more intense feelings than you can even imagine. God feels so deeply. He felt the hurt you go through. Only Christ can carry the hurts of the world. He has given you a precious gift – to take what exists and rearrange it for his glory. It will be unique to you because you are unique. The gift god gave you is CHOICE. He made you a tiny, finite version of him. The stuff of God is not us it is the image of God in our lives. When we see what he made we get a little clue of what can be done. Its real! God will show you his secrets if you LOVE him.

-Winkie Pratney (From New Zealand!)

When there are mornings that you are in the word and it feels dry - it is still in you. We are too driven by what “buzzes” us. It goes beyond that. What are you doing with your quiet time? I don’t have to have a buzz to praise the Lord. Lie – “I have to have the feeling or I’m a hypocrite.” Truth – “You must go deeper because the Lord IS there.” GO DEEPER!!

In the bible hate is not the opposite of love. Selfishness is the opposite of love.

God thinks bigger, deeper and wider than us. But not alien to us.

-Dave Buehring

Today I bought watermelon flavored lip smackers lip gloss. For the first time in my 20 years of life I wished I could be a little girl again. So I did it - I walked out of the store with sparkly lips and did a little dance.

And she's off! .. My best friend is in China.

Yesterday my best friend Sarah (brown) left for China. C H I N A ! I can't explain in words how proud I am of her. Going to China has been something that the Lord put on her adventurous heart for quite some time. To see her step out and do this is so encouraging. She doesn't have a group of people to fly with or any idea who she is going to meet when she steps off that plane. She is goin for it! It's just her and the Lord.. I'm so happy that I know her.

Sarah's been one of the few people in my life who when I'm around her makes me a better Lindsay. I've been through some crazy experiences with her. She's cried with me in other countries when the Lord spoke to me about becoming a missionary. We've driven, flown, walked, traveled the United States/World together. She's laughed with me as loud as we both possibly could over some pretty ridiculously funny things. She's gotten in trouble with me numerous times.. I'll spare the details. She's inspired me to be an artist. She's prayed with me when we both thought our worlds were crashing down. She's been mad for me when people have hurt me. She's told me when I've been stupid, arrogant, prideful, doing my best and still feeling like no one. She's shared a room with me and found out how mean of a person I become when I'm woken up in the middle of the night. She's had to put up with me when I don't give myself credit. She's loved me and let me love her. She's been there.. one of my best friends. Always will be.. can't go back now. She's mine for life.

Would you please pray for her with me? She is going to do incredibly wonderful things for the Kingdom.. but she seriously needs backup [prayer]. Pray for protection. Pray for the Holy Spirit to pour down on her. Pray for dreams and visions from the Lord. Pray specifically for people to come into her life that will challenge her. Pray for the people she will come in contact with. Pray that when she gets lonely she will look to Jesus! Just pray..

Even though we've already said our goodbyes when I left for Monroe, NC and have been separated for 6 weeks.. I feel, over again, the pain of saying goodbye. I miss her incredibly. I feel sad that I can't experience this with her but overjoyed that this is her adventure.. her time to obey God. Her time to g r o w.

I love you Sarah Maher. I will see you in 4 1/2 months and I will hug you until we both pee our pants.

It's Friday night Ya'll!

What a wonderful Friday night! Ah.. i love the weekend. Friday nights here at the base are quite an event. Usually Friday nights are spent running around the Blakney House.. sliding on the wood floor, belting out any random song that comes to mind, tackling each other and laughter! And it ends with a movie! This Friday we went to Chris and Megan Vengalas house (Our YWAM staff leaders) for dinner and s'mores by the campfire! IT WAS SO FUN. The meal was out of this world.. they are great cooks! There was much fellowship and hanging out and it was awesome. No agenda.. no running around.. no meetings. Pure chillin out. I thought I would introduce you to some of my YWAM friends!

This is Brittany. She's in the WISE school. She calls me "L-Niddle" .. I can't really tell ya why but I love it. I laugh so hard when I am with her. I also answer to her for my work duty-go hospitality and house keeping team!

Hello Sarah! She's in my DTS.. We have nick named her "Giggles" for obvious reasons :). Mmm S'mores!!

Beautiful Kristen.. love this girl! She's in the WISE school also and she is in charge of what goes on at Front Porch. She's so great with those kids!

Keniazh (DTS), Cassie (DTS), Sara (DTS), Elby (WISE) and Brittany (WISE)!

Crystal, Cassie and Elby playing the haha game!

Berkeley is a part of the WISE school. She is so much fun!! You can find her at any given moment singing Regina Spektor or Queen or any worship song under the sun. We have a few inside jokes already. Right Harold? haha! In this pic she's holding Zoe, Chris and Megans oldest daughter.

And THIS is Priya. The second of Chris and Megans four daughters. I babysit them every Tuesday and I have SO much fun. Last week we had a fashion show and the week before that we pretended to be cowgirls.. amazing. 

Britt, Berk, Linds, Kenz and Cassie!

This is Kenaizh and I with Heather (or Hovde as we call her. It's her last name). She's our DTS staff leader and chica we meet with on a one on one basis each week. We love Hovde!

This is only some of the girls.. I hope to get more pictures up here! I'm also working on a video that will include all of my DTS girls so you can meet them and get to know them a bit :).

more to come soon!!

My First Video Update! Week Five in YWAM-Charlotte!

First Video Update! Week Five! from Lindsay Beiler on Vimeo.

I just watched Pearl Harbor and literally SOBBED.